Today on the light rail, I felt like I was watching American Idol...you know, the crappy people that somehow make it onto the show just to make the ratings go higher so people can continue to make jokes about them for the next year...
This big dude gets on the rail with his skinny friend and sits in the row in front of me. He has music blasting in his ear phones. I wanted to start doing sign language with him because maybe he's hard of hearing. I continued to think this when he started making noises to the music.
You know the kind of noises R&B artists make? The "OOOOHHHH" "ahhhhhhhooooogurrrllll". That is what he started to do. He sounded like a dying whale, much like this lady. It continued on...
"MMMmmmmMMMMMM oooooOOooooooo baby...uyyyyeahhahdfhgheyweaweytfgadjghaeh"
^I don't know how to type his noises so that's why I just started banging on the keyboard there.^
Then he turned his music down when his skinny friend that looked about 18 said "Man, my wife is crazy, dawg."
This kid is married? He looks like he's 12!
Big Dude: "Why is that?"
Skinny Dude: "Man I be axin where we gun meet her and she goes Jack in the Box. Whadoilooklike a bank? She always be spendin my money."
Big Dude: "Man tell her to get her a$$ on the train."
Skinny Dude: "I know sshhhheeettt."
The big dude puts his head phones back in and continues his attempt at proving he should be the next Boys II Men.
Moral of the story: If you can't sing, please don't sing. Ever. Unless you're calling The Little Gym to sing "I have a beanbag, it's miss ladybug, I have a jumprope, sir centipede".