And to think I almost drove to work...

Today on the way to the light rail, a bird crapped on my shoulder.

I almost don't want to tell you the rest of the story because I can't seem to think any other way it would be a more ridiculous start to the morning. Supposedly a bird pooping on your shoulder is "good luck". I'll let you know how that pans out today...and yes, Adam, this is the 2nd time in a year this has happened to me.

Today ON the light rail, it was a hodge-podge of ridiculousness to add to the bird taking a load off on me. It was really crowded, so getting on the rail to even find a spot to stand was difficult, so it was no surprise when a lady's shirt became stuck in the door as she squeezed on the train.

Dying Whale: "I'M STUCKKK!!!!!!!!! I'M STUCK!!!!!!!!!!AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! MY SHIRRRRTTTT!!!!!!!! OPEN THE DOOR!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!"

Obviously, the driver cannot hear the woman. Nor does he care. So I just continue laughing as the woman screams until the doors open at the next stop.

The next event occurring on the light rail is why I sometimes wish this train was more like a NY subway. Cell phones- they don't work underground. It's ok to text/tweet on the rail…but for the love of all things holy, please don't talk on your cell phone...especially if you're old and loud and are hard of hearing.

Woman: "HELLO?!?!"
(pause)
Woman: "THIS IS SHE, ME.............YEEAHHHH GIRL HOW'S IT GOIN??.......NAW I'M JUST ON THE RAIL....I GOT A DOCTOR'S APPOINTMENT...........YEAH.......OH NO IT'S JUST FOR MY ALLERGIES......YEAH I'M ON MY WAY RIGHT NOW...............OH I KNOW.....DID YOU HEAR ABOUT PASTOR  ......OOOOOOOO GIRL LET ME TELL YOU.....MMMMMMMMHHHHHHHHHHHMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM.......MMMMMHHMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM....."

This goes on for about 2 minutes of the woman nodding. I would've been OK with her cell phone talking if a) she wasn't so loud and b) she wasn't putting make up on while on the phone while sitting next to me, therefore spilling her make-up on my pants.

Woman: "AIGHT GIRL LEMME CALL YOU BACK CUS IMMABOUT TO BE AT THE DOCTOR. ALRIGHT. ALRIGHT. ALRIGHT..MMMmBYE"

I could've done without hearing about the woman's pastor who is cheating on his wife this morning.

Moral of the story: A bird pooping on your shoulder = you should've forked over the $10 to pay for parking today.