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Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Now, why are you into Vampires again?

Today on the light rail, I stood 10 inches from Count Dracula.

Mind you, I'm not one that's into vampires.  I've seen True Blood a few times but never any of the Twilight movies or read the books.  I did, however, eat this cereal when I was a kid, so I know what I'm talking about here when I say this man was a vampire.

He got onto the light rail and reeked of marijuana.  Bad.  I felt like I was going to smell like I'd been tokin up when I got to work just because of this man.  He was a street man, obviously (learned that term recently since I don't actually know if he's homeless).  He was acting strange...maybe because of the drugs.  He had a very odd shaped jaw and it kind of freaked me out.

And then he opened his mouth...and it looked like this....

He was missing a few of the front teeth...but his incisors were definitely fangs.  He kept looking around everywhere and at one point started to lick his arm.  Yes, he was licking himself.  I was a little creeped out so I moved to the other door.  I didn't want to have blood sucked out of my neck by this guy..not today.

Sure enough he got off at the soup kitchen stop.  Good. Let the soup kitchen volunteers deal with the vamp.

Moral of the story: If you're obsessed with Twilight, you're an idiot.

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